


You Lead, I'll Follow

by Floatinglonewanderer



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: But Hanzo is dead, Cutting, For delicaterosebud at least, GIVE ME ALL THE FEEDBACK, How Do I Tag, I hope I do, I might finish, I'm Sorry, I'm trying to make this very emotional, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Character Death, Slow To Update, Survivor Guilt, Triggers, hanahaki, maybe not, sooo...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2019-04-14 20:20:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14143791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Floatinglonewanderer/pseuds/Floatinglonewanderer
Summary: It has been two months since Hanzo's death and Genji's departure. Jesse is left to carry on the weight of his mistakes...And his heart.How do you save a man who doesn't want to be saved?Should you?Author formally known as Songfern1128Updated to be 1 Chapter only. More in the End Notes.





	You Lead, I'll Follow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [delicaterosebud](https://archiveofourown.org/users/delicaterosebud/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Wither](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13463877) by [delicaterosebud](https://archiveofourown.org/users/delicaterosebud/pseuds/delicaterosebud). 



> This is a sequel of Wither dedicated to the one and only, amazingly talented writer delicaterosebud! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Also, it wouldn't let me tag it a Hanahaki for some reason.
> 
> Oh well!
> 
> Update.
> 
> It has been months since I wrote this and had Chapter 2 stewing since... for fucking ever and every time I looked at it it just got harder and harder to write. I'm going to just leave it as an open ending so I don't torment myself for not being able to finish it.
> 
> I'm really sorry. To anyone who was looking forward to an actual chapter, I am truly sorry for everything. Thank you all for your support!

 

Find him! He couldn’t have made it too far!” A gruff voice barked out a distance away.

  
_It's not him._

  
“Jesse?”, called a soft, grandmotherly voice that would normally comfort you when you hear it.

  
_It's not him._

  
“Jesse, come back!” A light voice, beautifully accented. You would think that voice belonged to an angel.

  
_It's not him._

  
“Where are you?!” A loud roar, coming from a man with the heart of a lion.

  
_It's **not** him!_

  
“Come back!” Danger. That voice with his love's light accent, tinged with a metallic undertone. Dangerous!

_It's. Not. **Him!**_

  
Jesse stumbled blindly throughout the halls of the watch point, running his hand along the walls as he desperately made his way to Hanzo's shrine.

  
Hanzo… he needed to get to Hanzo. He had to. He must feel so alone. No one was there to talk to him.

  
They tried to keep him away from his Sunshine. They’re trying to keep him away! I can’t let them erase Hanzo again!

  
“Sh-should’ve gone… Should’ve gone to the f-funeral.” He must have been alone.

  
When the walls lead to the doorway the McCree fell to his knees, crawling on the ground where he remembered Hanzo's grave to be. He wept in relief as he touched the rock where his darlin’s shrine was.

  
“I-It’s me a-a-again, S-sunshine.” He's here. “I didn’t f-forget…”

  
"I... I don’t wanna be h-h-here anymore….” _It’s cold without you. I'm so sorry darlin'. So, so sorry-_

  
  
Voices behind him call louder and louder. No. No! I gotta be with Hanzo! 

McCree reveals the scalpel he swiped from Angela’s med bay. He holds the blade to his wrist and slices it with little hesitation. Only a small river of blood and deceptively sharp petals fall to the floor. It wasn’t enough to join Hanzo.

  
Jesse screams.

  
He screams and screams until the thunder of footsteps and clamoring voices gain on him and took Jesse away from his Sunshine once more.

* * *

_**8 months ago...** _

  
Nothing had changed.

  
The flower in the sake cup had died long ago, and it’s soaked petals were so brown and transparent that it should have been tossed immediately. Genji must’ve lost the will to throw the last remnant of Hanzo's humanity, because he left it alone before he departed with his master to Nepal.

  
The incense stand was still there since the funeral, as was the small urn that held Hanzo's ashes. The incense had burned up, leaving only two tiny wooden sticks that once stood upright. In Japanese culture, incense placed straight up symbolized death. Genji must’ve put that there too.

  
And the photo… Hanzo's picture for the Overwatch roster was used. Three-quarter angle, hair in that high ponytail that made the archer look so regal, his wings and single bang framing his sharp features, and that scowl that would make a lesser man run.  
Hanzo’s shrine was exactly as he'd left it the night before.

  
If you could call 0300 in the morning “last night”. It’s 0650 now and still nearly pitch black if it weren’t for the full moon peaking behind the thick clouds up above.

  
Jesse walks up to the shrine with a small basket in hand. Kneeling in front of it, Jesse takes two sticks of incense and sets them upright.

  
“G'mornin', sunshine.” The cowboy lets out a heavy breath, brushing a hand over his face as if to chase the tiredness and grief away.

  
“Today’s the two month anniversary of your death. I miss you a lot, Han. More than you would ever know...” Jesse swallows the lump in his throat and tries to hold back the tears. It's hard.

Since Hanzo died, the everyyhing almost returned to normal. Winston continued issuing missions on the regular, team activities still ran every Thursday, jokes were made and it seemed as if Hanzo never existed. 

Nobody recognizes Genji's anger when the ones on the team that were closer to him called on occasion to keep in contact. Nobody noticed that Angela had kept to herself more, obsessively researching the disease that took the archer on top of maintaining the lab and health of the team.

Nobody cared but Jesse.

  
“I brought you some breakfast. Pancakes and egg, since I don’t really know what you normally eat for breakfast. Damn shame, ain’t it. Your journals barely said anything about what you like, besides me." If he had found the journals before he talked to Hanzo he would've probably shot him then and there. It should have been unsettling that Genji's almost-murderer knew so much about him when they hardly interacted. Instead, Jesse was sad that Hanzo felt he had to do so in the first place. Maybe he wouldn't have to resort to spying from a distance for fear of "startling" him. Maybe if they had talked more, Jesse would've known the man behind the mask. 

  
"I can only speculate about you, ya know? Genji hasn’t called the base and I ain’t about to call 'im first after what happened. I… really regret not talking to you sooner. Maybe I could’ve talked you into that surgery, I don’t know! Jesse takes deep, heaving breathes as he desperately tries to hold back tears. threatening to overwhelm him. “I just want you back. We didn’t have enough time.”

  
“I’m gonna tell Angie about my Hanahaki. It’s been two months now and the flowers are getting harder to hide. I’m not gonna get the surgery, you know. I can imagine you going against that, but I made up my mind. I miss you.“

  
McCree shifts his gaze from the shrine to the gulf. The water was pitch black. A sea of nothing. His own personal Tartarus.

  
“I better get to tellin' Angela the news. It ain’t gon' be pretty, but it'd be better to rip off the band-aid than to let it fester. I love you Hanzo. Don’t think I don’t. I’ll see you at High Noon.” Jesse stands up and looks at the upcoming sunrise for a moment longer, taking in the morning sky in peace for what felt like the last time.

  
Jesse turned towards the cold grey doors of the base's roof and walked back inside before the sun's light could reach the dark hall he disappeared into.


End file.
